Which soap you should choose based on your star sign

via GIPHY

Well well well, so you’ve found yourself trawling the nuddy website? And here you are. Hi there! You’re either bored at work and just cannot for the life of you take your eyes away from our sick content (we get it, may we recommend our Insta? It’s a procrastinator’s paradise) or you’re toing and froing about which flavour soap to buy. Whether it’s the former or the latter, you’re definitely in the right place because A, this will knock about 3 minutes off your boredom and B, you’ll finally know which soap to buy.

Whether you regularly get #inthenuddy or you’re a first timer (don’t worry, we’re gentle), I’m here to help you make a more celestial-but-by-no-means-scientific decision on which soap to add to your basket. Honestly, I feel like I’m hosting an episode of The Bachelor here, I’m so excited for you.

Aries = Lime + Lemon
Oooo Aries, feisty one you are. You’re powerful and dominant and quite often referred to as ‘The Boss’. Just like Aries, the Lime + Lemon nuddy soap is sure to bring a bit of confidence and swag to the bathroom – it’s invigorating, energising and is the soap to get the people going, just like you, Aries.  

Taurus = Pack of 5
As a fellow Taurus, I know a thing or two about how we are as people and that’s greedy, typically materialistic (not me, though) and incredibly indecisive. With that in mind, we get the multi-pack of 5. This way, you/we get the best of five worlds and when we’re feeling indecisive we can just rub all 5 all over our bodies at once.

Gemini = Coconut
When you smell coconut, you think of warm, exotic shores, Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain. As a romantic and affectionate sign, it only seems right that Geminis would be attracted to the tropical nature of coconut soap. It’s also rather true that Geminis often wear their heart on their sleeve and go coco-NUTS for pretty much everyone they meet.  

Cancer = Lime + Lemon

Lime + Lemon scented stuff goes back to the very beginning of beauty products. It’s an OG scent but has its zesty moments. Similarly, Cancer is loyal and tenacious yet can be a little bit of a party animal when the mood is right. And, honestly, if you were to pick any soap to have a party in the bath with, it’d deffo be Lime + Lemon, amirite?  

Leo = Orange + Lemon
If you think I’m going to pair Leo with the Orange + Lemon simply because there’s a lion on the packaging then you’d be absolutely right. That is all. Jk bbz, I’d never let you Leos down like that. Leos are summer babies, just like this soap. They’re creative, bold and cheerful people who radiate energy and va-va-voom, and that’s what this limited edition bar is all about.

Virgo = Peppermint
A peppermint soap is traditional and humble. It reminds us of Grandfather James from The Parent Trap when Annie (but really it’s Hallie) sniffs him and says he smells like “peppermint and pipe tobacco”. Like Grandfather James, a Virgo is intellectual, logical and loyal and if that’s you, then you need to add peppermint to your basket ASAP. Honestly, don’t ask me how I made these connections.

Libra = Peppermint
A Libra is as elegant and gracious as a swan and this zodiac really should be a swan symbol (why isn’t it a swan symbol? What do the Balance Scales even mean?). Libras are likeable and very well respected but by no means boring. They’re artistes and social butterflies and it’s exactly how I’d imagine the scent of peppermint to be if it was a human being.

Scorpio = Pack of 5
IMO, Scorpios are the underdog of the zodiac. They’re dark, deep and complicated and often very introspective. They’re a complete enigma and it’s fascinating. Because of this, we just never know what they’re thinking and who knows which soap they’d choose? I mean, they’re so mysterious, they probably don’t even know which soap they’d like to buy which is why they would (and should) buy all 5.

Sagittarius = Coconut
A Sagittarius is a wanderer and seeker. They find pleasure in everything and are restless in their pursuit for pleasure. If any soap scent is to bring total delight and fulfilment to a Sagittarian’s life it’s coconut. I can picture you Sags now, standing in the shower, lathering up and singing Harry Nilsson’s Coconut song.

Capricorn = Pink Grapefruit

Good morning/evening Capricorn, how nice of you to drop by! Polite and responsible, a Capricorn is by far the most deadpan of all the signs (no offence). But, with a goat as your sign, it shows you still like to have fun and let your hair down. Thus is why I’m pairing you with pink grapefruit – it’s zingy and zesty but trusty and disciplined all the same. It’s a perfect balance.

Aquarius = Mango
As an independent, original and super cool gal, an Aquarius has no qualms with letting that man-go which is why you need mango, duh. It’s said that Aquarians are often people pleasers and if there’s a soap that pleases just about any acquired nostril, it’s mango. It’s also fresh, fruity and fun, just like a true Aquarian.

Pisces = Pink Grapefruit
Though it’s rather bitter in scent, there’s nothing bitter about nuddy pink grapefruit soap. It’s gentle, fruity and incredibly juicy and it’s here to show you a good time. And nor is there anything bitter about a Pisces. They’re artistic and dreamy beings and are often empathetic lovers. They love to touch and be touched, just like the pink grapefruit soap.

Words - Hannah Liddle.