My Journey To Self Love - Kassi They say a good place to begin is the start. But sometimes pinpointing the start isn’t as easy...read more..
STRIPPED DOWN - PART 7
Stripped down - The Series
My names Bianca, and i'm gonna strip dowwwwwn. I remember back to being a young girl and gazing up at these cool, fresh faced adults in their twenties thinking they were some kind of superheroes. Smart, free, and totally at liberty to conquer the world. Later on when in my teens I remember plotting the path to a perfect job, a dream marriage, or just generally settling to be a millionaire by the age of 25. It felt like a done deal.
In actual fact, by the time I had turned 25 I had quit my relentless, soul crushing, money making job in the city and ditched everything my previous life had known. I was backpacking the world solo, living in a tent situated somewhere on an island off the East Coast of Australia, and trying earnestly to deal with the recent death of my father. Everyday I was running out of money, courage and will power, not to mention completely trying to forget about my failing relationship with my boyfriend at the time back home.
It was roughly at that moment I realised being in your mid-twenties was not as glamorous and care-free as my childhood optimism had made it out to be. Relationships come and go faster than your income; belief in your self is even less reliable. It actually kind of sucked.
This life recipe combined with those twenty-something years being the pivotal time everyone else around you seems to start getting their sh*t together, makes it a series of the most mind-bending years of the your life. Or at least in my experience. The wedding invites begin to arrive, the house warming parties for their first properties, the LinkedIn updates to remind you of their turbo-charged career progression… in a job they actually like! Please can we not mention the baby photos?
When I turned 26 and returned back to England I went through the second largest shift you can expect from life in your 20s. It may have been the year away that helped give me clarity, the loss of a loved one that gave me a new appreciation for life or simply failing so many times that the fear of failure was no longer a thing. I will probably never know, but the view I now held began to change my life.
I started to view my 20s as the years where I am old enough to do whatever I want, but not to be hard on myself, I am still young enough to make mistakes and learn from them. I began to value my time as if it weren’t infinite. I sought control over the moment. I proactively furthered my education and took some exams so that I could change careers. I left the unhappy relationship I had been holding onto for far too long, as it was only fulfilling the ideals of love I saw in my friend’s relationships, or in films. I started to make time everyday to be thankful for everything I do have instead of worrying about what I was missing. I joined new charities so I could meet new people and immerse myself in new experiences. I began cherishing the indepence I had and making the most of the opportunities around me.
Soon after turning 26, I set up my own business, combining personal training, mindfulness coaching, and nutrition. Most importantly, through this I was investing my energy in to what I love - helping others be as happy and as healthy as they can possibly be, working together to unleash their potential. Working alongside individuals who are fighting their own battles whether it be mental health disorders, marital break ups, running high pressured businesses or just the day to day stressors we have to deal with now in this ever increasingly demanding society we find ourselves in, my job is a constant reminder of how testing life can be. Everyone is going through their own problems and on their own path - the last thing we should be doing is applying more pressure to ourselves when their is already a plethora of it on us.
Now believe me, I love what I do and I’ve discovered my passion, but these days are potentially more hazardous than ever. There’s no clear path ahead, I’m walking through the dark with my hands out. If my clients all disappeared, I’d be at the mercy of my overdraft. If I contemplated all the ‘ifs’, I’d need more than a herbal tea to calm down. But after that point, I’d remember the perspective my twenties have bought me - that failure is an opportunity to improve.
What I say to you is the same as what I say to my clients, don’t base how you feel about your twenties on ancient paradigms. If the relationship isn’t right, don’t be in it. If your job makes you sad, quit it. If you want to set up a business, set it up. If your new business fails, start again. Travel. Explore. Buy expensive things for yourself. Make love. Get drunk. Invest in your overly expensive gym classes. Take time for your happiness. Enjoy being with your friends. Appreciate your parents. Buy the dog. Do everything that you won’t be able to do when all those responsibilities come knocking and the mortgage needs paid them you need to drop the kids at school.
Crucially, for your own sanity, and arguably the most important point here, do not compare yourself to others. Be genuinely happy for your friends. Celebrate their career progressions, cry out of joy when they get married, but them fancy pot plants for their new homes, like the 6333627283552th photo of their baby on instagram. We all have our time in life and yours will come, but always, always be happy for when others have their moment.
Being in your 20s is one of the most exhilarating times of your life, enjoy it. Don’t fear failure and wait for bad to happen to make you truly appreciate your time. Don’t let your desire for more get in the way of appreciating what you already have.
THANK YOU B for stripping down with us! Take a look at our range of nuddy soap bars below. They're all vegan friendly, plastic/cruelty/sls free and made right here in the U.K. If you're gonna strip down, make sure you do it with nuddy!